My sister-in-law asked me to write this article. She must be lamenting.
The best place to lament is at the Wailing Wall. You can see the Wailing Wall at http://www.aish.com/wallcam/. The picture changes often so you will know what is going on.
I suggest that you do your wailing right in front of your computer. Look at the picture. Every time it updates, do your wailing.
To lament you show strong regret aloud. That's the only way to really do it. First you need a list of things over which to lament. Here are some suggestions:
1.You forgot to buy a lottery ticket for the National Lottery last week and your regular number came up. That cost you a zillion dollars.
2.You spent $40,000.00 on your son's education and he is working at McDonalds after graduating in social studies with a Spanish minor. He graduated magna cum laude. You talked him out of majoring in celestial mechanics.
3.Your grandkids have come to live with you until they are graduated from college. Their ages are 4, 7, 9, and 13. You will be 87 years old when the youngest graduates and your spouse will be 96 years old.
4.You bought a used car from a little old lady. The 1986 Ford had only 40,000 miles on it. Yesterday the transmission went out. The owner of the transmission repair shop said, "This is Mrs. Henderson's old car, isn't it? Yes, that is the transmission I put in it at 98,000 miles. I checked it at 149, 000 miles and again at 199,000 miles. Well, she got her money's worth. Let's see, I can replace that for you for $2300.00. However, that rebuilt engine isn't going to last forever. Did you look at those tires? Does it still pull to the right when you break for dogs?
5.You had a chance to talk about your new business with a rich acquaintance you met on the golf course and gain some financial support from him. When his ball went into the lake, you laughed.
Well, that should get you going. Now how to you do the actual lamenting? Well, get the Wailing Wall Picture on your monitor by going to http://www.aish.com/wallcam/.
Chant as follows:
I lost a zillion dollars! I lost a zillion dollars! I lost a zillion dollars!
Forty Grand and my son works at McDonalds! Forty Grand and my son works at McDonalds! Forty Grand and my son works at McDonalds!
We're raising kids again! We're raising kids again! We're raising kids again!
I got ripped off by a nice old lady! I got ripped off by a nice old lady! I got ripped off by a nice old lady!
I laughed my business away! I laughed my business away! I laughed my business away!
A nice ending to your chant might be:
Why am I so stupid? Why can't I do anything right? Please God, give me another chance! Please God, give me another chance!
Well, that should do it for my sister-in-law. Jump right in!
The End
John T. Jones, Ph.D. (tjbooks@hotmail.com, a retired VP of R&D for Lenox China, is author of detective & western novels, nonfiction (business, scientific, engineering, humor), poetry, etc. Former editor of Ceramic Industry Magazine. He is Executive Representative of IWS sellers of Tyler Hicks wealth-success books and kits. He also sells TopFlight flagpoles. He calls himself "Taylor Jones, the hack writer."
More info: http://www.tjbooks.com
Business web site: http://www.dumbincome.com
